Friday, April 27, 2012

No Butts About It. We Like Them Bare!

BUMS, BOTTOMS, butts, buttocks, derrieres, culs, tushes, tails, and traseros.  However you say it, in any language, we like them.  And we like them bare when possible.

Lest you think there’s something illicit in all this, we’ll be straight about saying that we like naked heineys.  Including those of cute little babies crawling bare on the bearskin rugs… complete with all their dimples and creases.  We’ve also written before that we smiled every time we saw the original Coppertone advertisement with the little girl in pigtails blushing while a terrier’s tug on her bikini bottoms showed us her pale cheeks.

We’re an equal opportunity admirer. Male or female, younger or older, we don’t care: they look better bare!  What about those of us who “sag” or show cellulite?  We may not be in our prime, but do our nalgas look any better crammed into a lycra swimsuit or in pants hitched too high with whales printed on them?  Didn’t think so.
Some will dismiss this as mere fetish but they don’t understand.  Your Platypusses’ admiration comes from that place in the heart and mind that inspires awe when looking at a prairie sky, a Frank Lloyd Wright building, an Ansel Adams photograph of Yosemite, or a classic Duisenberg automobile.

One of our Bare Platypus staff has remarked that if he makes it to heaven, he’s going to be sure to compliment Almighty God on the form, functionality, and fittingness of the human posterior and he genuinely, sincerely, means that with no suggestion of sacrilege.

Regrettably, most of society’s customs mean that our bums are usually covered, not bare.  But many within the naturist community are of kindred mind with the Platypus.  We have seen your twitter icons, your avatars, and your profiles.

We know you understand.

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